jokes about work

This is crowd surfing like a boss #concert #music
the first 5 days #work
IKEA job interview #seat
Adam is looking for a job #billboard
the difference between a boss and a leader
this stuff doesnt work #dog
These will definitely work! #bacardi #vodka
I you werent so stupid #job
Dog failing like a boss jumping a fence
sorry I cant go to work today I fractured my motivation
motion sensors at work
guy gaming at work having to fight boss
T-rex has too tiny arms to change the water bottle
Horn taped under chair
we all know that guy doing nothing while others work
mondays arent so bad its your job that sucks
space mountain thrillride
Late for work!
He just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day, 5, 10 minutes late. But he was a good ...
Office Arithmatic
OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production ...
Discipline
A frustrated father told a work colleague: “When I was a youngster, I was disciplined by being ...
Prison
Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards ...
Work
At work there were three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde, who worked together at the ...
Sick Leave
I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I ...
Nice House
Carlos calls his boss in the morning: Ey, boss i not come work today I really sick. I got ...
Office Game
Here's a way to spice up your office. Pick two or three colleagues and agree to play the Office ...
New Job
Pat and Mick have just started their job installing telegraph poles. At the end of the first week ...
50-50
A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. I welcome you into the family, ...
Work
Salesman: This computer will cut your workload by 50%. Office Manager: That's great, I'll take two ...
Work
Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could ...
Newest son-in-law
A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. "I love my daughter, and now I ...
The Boss
Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the ...
Duck
A duck walks into a job center and says to the man behind the desk 'Excuse me; I'm looking for a ...
Blonde Line Painter
A road crew supervisor hired a nice-looking blonde woman to assist with painting the yellow line ...
NO COME WORK TODAY
Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, ...
Drinking At Work
Here's a few great reasons to allow drinking in the workplace... 1. It's an incentive to show up. ...
The Boss
The boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect. ...
Help the Wife
Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some ...
Cracking the Human Resource Code
COMPETITIVE SALARY Most of our competitors don't pay much either. "JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY" ...
New Job
Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as ...
Stopping by the Office
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. She found him with ...
Work
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with ...
Tired
For a couple years I 've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but ...
Evaluation Comments
Dictionary of Evaluation Comments Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really ...
Watchman
A man is being interviewed for a job. “What are your qualifications for the job of night ...
At Work
At work A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants. Don't be ...
Evaluation Comments
Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee ...
Actual Job Interviews
We’ve been over this before: 
Stupid doesn’t play well on job interviews. Hiring managers ...
Sick Day
A man calls in to work. "I can't come in today.." The boss says, "Why what's wrong?" " My ...
Hate your Job?
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called ...
Shovels
One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have forgotten ...
Blond Job
A blond walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few ...
Why Men Can't Win
Why Men Can't Win If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work ...
The Shredder
A young engineer was leaving the office at 3.45 p.m. when he found the acting CEO standing in front ...
Job Interview
An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting ...
Paint the Porch
A blonde moves to Beverly Hills, hoping to find an acting job. After a couple weeks with no luck, ...
Ten Top Things That Sound Dirty At The Office, But Aren't
Ten Top Things That Sound Dirty At The Office, But Aren't: 10. I need to whip it out by 5. 9. ...
Understanting Help Wanted Ads
Understanting Help Wanted Ads What we say:Competitive Salary What we mean: We remain ...
Lemons
A woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed too qualified for the job. 'Look ...
Loudspeaker
A voice on the office loudspeaker announced: "We will be testing the speaker system to make sure it ...
A young guy from Missouri
A young guy from Missouri moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under the roof department ...
Sales force
A small company was on the edge of bankruptcy. The owner summoned his two-man sales force into ...
How to Please Your I.T. Department
01. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of ...
Don't argue with a Vet!!
I got this story sent: One day at the veterinarian's office where I take my cat, a man and the ...
Babies
Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse ...
Divorced
Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. ...
Four expectant fathers
Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse ...
The pretty young secretary
The pretty young secretary had been transferred to the companys Dallas office. "We operate the ...
Camping
Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their motor home. ...
Depressed
A man walked into a therapist's office looking very depressed. "Doc, you've got to help me. I can't ...
A Dentist's Office
A man and his wife walked into a dentist's office. The man said to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one ...
A few Days off
I decided that I needed a few days off and realized that I had run out of vacation time already. ...
Memo from Accounting Department
It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in time sheets that ...
Job
A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for ...
Prison vs. Work
-- In prison, you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell. At work, you spend most of ...
Job Center
A retired man went into the Job Center in downtown Nanaimo British Columbia and saw a card ...
Excuse
Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting ...
Pretty Pussy
John gets home from work one day and finds his pretty blonde wife has been crying. "What's wrong?" ...
Prison or Work
IN PRISON: You spend the majority of your time in a 10X10 cell. AT WORK: You spend the majority of ...
Fishing
A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I need to go ...
Post office
A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery Store. As he waited, he was ...
Married Couple
A married couple are sitting in the office of a marriage counselor. Neither of them have said a ...
Black eyes
A man walked into work on Monday with two black eyes. His boss asked what happened. The man said, ...
Nice
The population of this country is 300 million. 160 million are retired. That leaves 140 million ...
Zoo
This guy needs a job and decides to apply at the zoo. As it happened, their star attraction, a ...
Girlfriend
A young guy was complaining to his Boss about the problems he was having with his stubborn ...
Different
Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, ...
40 things you would like to say at work
40 things you would like to say at work 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full ...
The Penis
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: 1. I do physical ...
Help Wanted
A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying: "HELP WANTED. ...
Prison Vs Work
Prison Vs Work IN PRISON..........you spend the majority of your time in a 10X10 cell. AT WORK.. ...
The Boss
The boss was in a quandary; he had to get rid of one of his staff. He had narrowed it down to one ...
Product Wording
NEW - Different color from previous design. ALL NEW - Parts are not interchangeable with ...
Gynaecologist's Assistant
A bloke goes into the Job Centre in Chelsea and sees a card advertising for a Gynaecologist's ...
Post Office
The old man approached a young stranger in the post office and asked, "Sir, would you address this ...
Lovemaking Aid
Ewis walked into my office ...
Prison vs Work
Prison vs Work Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed up, this should make ...
Why I fired my Secretary
Why I fired my Secretary Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that ...
Homeless
A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. ...
Blondes on the Job
Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the ...
Jesus and Satan
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had ...
Computers
You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand ...
Contractors
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, ...
Post Office
There was a man who worked for the Post Office... whose job it was to process all the mail that had ...
Rectal Thermometer
When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this: On your way home from work, stop at your ...
Thermos
A blonde was shopping at Target and came across a shiny silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by ...
Work
Two guys work for the city: one furiously digs a hole, the other quickly fills the hole. A ...
The Frog
A woman went into a pet shop to buy her husband a pet. After looking around she realized that all ...
Penis
I the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labor. ...
Things to sayat work when you're stressed
Things to sayat work when you're stressed: "Okay, okay! I take it back. Unscrew you" "You ...
Job Interview
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out ...
Cut Workload
Salesman: This computer will cut your workload by 50%. Office Manager: That's great, I'll take two ...
Useful work phrases
1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 2. The fact that no ...
THINGS YOUD LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK
THINGS YOUD LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full ...
Top 10 SIGNS your family is STRESSED...
10. Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then we can talk". 9. The school ...
Office humor
Best Things to say if Caught Sleeping At Your Desk... "They told me at the blood bank this might ...
Home from Work
A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger doing his wife. He says, " ...
Nick the Dragon Slayer
Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen's voluptuous ...

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