jokes about children

How kids show their appreciation for their dad!
Girl gives a giftcard for christmas so it cant be spend on drugs
This boy wants to be a musician when he grows up
never make fun of having to help me with computer stuff #children
Please read the sign Golfers #children #expose
When moms alone with the baby and when dads alone
that awkward moment your kid realizes #math
a dog wondering whos a good boy
woman going to the doctor
kid saved for a new macbook, bough equivalent pc and a car instead
someone played hide and seek with his father for 20 years
to this day the boy bullying me at school still takes my lunch money
Old men explains you cant do cheap shopping anymore
Mom of sick child gets enough facebook likes for operation
this is what you should do to your kids car!
Boy you really messed up this time!
a boy drinking from a can
Your child is being eaten by a camel
girl in bikini has no power here
kid dresses up as fire hose
girl with a champange glass in her mouth
advice to mom spend money on child not on slutty clothes
obama letting a child in on a secret
Cartoonist drawing fat girl as jabba the hut
mutual pillow dog sleeping on girl sleeping on dog
girl with shorts wearing hat
boy making fool of himself with donkey ears
girl with cat looking like beard
little boy at big toilet urinal
nothing says I hate you more than giving someones child a drum set
boy taking picture of crocodile upclose
duck face Elmer shooting girl
nerdy kid sitting with beautiful girls
kid drawing on dog
girl with shadow on her leg making it seem like she has a long penis
kid hiding two letters from the womens dressing room
girl scared of dolphin
boy stuck on a fence
girl playing tennis cat shadow
fat girl jumping off stage
girl falling of swing
less stuff from the dollar store girl on santa's lap
flexible girl curled arms
irish girl sunbathing pale
duck ducklings down drain
Harry Potter How I met your mom
dog peeing on girl sunbathing
girl breasts knees
police little kid mustang
Annoying Boy on Bus
A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''If my dad ...
Dickhead
A couple had twin sons from about one year old. The first one could talk. The second one couldn't. ...
Parents
A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, "If my dad ...
People
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, ...
The Human Race
A little girl asked her mother, 'How did the human race appear?' The mother answered, 'God made ...
The tradition at weddings
A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?" His ...
Italian kid
Italian kid.. 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'. The ...
Psychiatrist Diagnosis
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small ...
Parents
Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of ...
Kids
It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children ...
Sinned
The girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned." "What is it, ...
Dumb Kid
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer,"This is the dumbest kid ...
A Kindergarten teacher
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would ...
Blond
A blond woman desperately needed some money, so she decided to kidnap someone. So she went to the ...
Two boys
Two boys argue over whose parents are better. The first boy says, "My dad's better than your dad. ...
Dad
One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking ...
Children
"I don't think my mom knows much about children." "Why do you say that?" "Because she always puts ...
Kids
A little girl and a little boy were at daycare. The girl approached the boy and said, "Hey, Stevie, ...
Confucious
Confucious say, "Is good for girl to meet boy in park... but is better for boy to park meat in ...
Giving birth
Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, ...
An 18-year old Italian girl
An 18-year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for 2 months. Very ...
Politics
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is Politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to ...
A Study
A college professor was doing a study testing the senses of first graders using a bowl of ...
Ice Cream
A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and was mad. Mom : "Dinner is going to ...
Rich Boy's nose cut
A rich but spoilt boy fell in love with a girl and showered her with gifts though she didn't ...
Hershey Kiss
One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. ...
The Mall
An Antartian boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they ...
Son
There was a middle aged couple that had two stunningly beautiful teenage daughters. The couple ...
Spin the Bottle
"We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it pointed ...
Wives and Husbands and more
Wives and Husbands and more Wife: "What are you doing?" Husband: "Nothing." Wife: "Nothing...? ...
Don't Kick the Animals
A boy awoke and wanted breakfast so he told his mother. She said, "Not until you feed the animals." ...
Just Like My Mom
Manny was almost 29 years old. Most of his friends had already gotten married, and Manny just ...
Flat Tummy
A little boy walks into his parents room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The ...
White weddingdress
A son asked his mother the following question: 'Mom, why are wedding dresses white?' The mother ...
Being parents
Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of ...
Kite
One day a father and son are flying a kite. The kite is going in circles and crashing. The father ...
Fortune Teller
A man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see a fortune teller's tent. Thinking it ...
Little Boy
A salesman goes up to a house and knocks on the front door. It's opened by a little ten year-old ...
Wedding Dress
A son asked his mother the following question: 'Mom, why are wedding dresses white?' The mother ...
The Way Children See Things!
The Way Children See Things! NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm ...
Tampons
A nine-year old boy goes into the grocery store, grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries ...
Teen
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. "Wow!," ...
Dad and Son
A dad walks into a market with his young son. The kid is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the boy ...
kids in the Hospital
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on beds next to each other, outside the operating room. ...
Amish elevator
An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but ...
The birds and the bees
A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees. 'I don't want to know,' ...
The Affair 1
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They ...
Daddy Longlegs
A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and ...
Meaning of... 'potentially' and 'realistically'
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' ...
Kids
At the shops a man noticed a lady eyeing his two adopted children curiously. The boy was blond, ...
Dark in here, isn't it?
A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son ...
God
After Leslie brought home her fiance to meet her parents, her father invited the young man into his ...
A Dog in Heat
A little girl asked her mum, "Mum, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mum replies, " ...
50th wedding anniversary
A couple were celebrating 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful, agreed to a ...
Little Johnny
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse ...
Children
Mrs. McGervey was walking down O'Connell Street in Dublin when she met up with Father O'Flaherty. ...
questions
A Mom is driving a little girl to her friends house for a play date. "Mommy," the little girl asks, ...
God
A young woman visits her parents and brings her fiancé to meet them. After an elaborate dinner, ...
Horse Auction
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from ...
Butt Dust
What, you ask, is "Butt Dust"? Read on and you'll discover the joy in a child's sincere originality. ...
Nickles
A father walks into a restaurant with his young son. He gives the boy 3 nickels to play with to ...
Business is Business ...
Business is Business ... A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, ...
Condoms
A young boy and his father were in a store when they walked past a rack of condoms. Being a curious ...
Choking
A father walks into a book store with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the ...
Indian
One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answers, "Well son ...
Undies
A blonde girl came home from college one day and told her mother that a boy had paid her a dollar ...
Pregnant
A young girl was very much interested in the progress of her mother’s pregnancy. Finally the day ...
Kids...
Another submitted story:

Ever notice how a 4 year old's voice is louder than 200 adult voices? ...

Pregnant
An 18 year-old girl tells her Mum that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the ...
Fatal Things to Say to Your Pregnant Wife
Fatal Things to Say to Your Pregnant Wife "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid ...
A young cowboy
A young cowboy from Wyoming goes off to college, but half way through the semester, he has ...
Church
A Sunday school teacher asked her children on the way to service, "And why is it necessary to be ...
Grave
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his ...
School answering Machine
SCHOOL ANSWERING MACHINE (This is hilarious - no wonder some people were offended!) This is the ...
Little Boy
A little boy knocks at the door and tells the owner that something of his had found its way into ...
God
A little girl is sitting on her grandpa's lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets ...
Daughter
The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex. Worried the girl ...
Father
A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The ...
Acrobatic Dancer
As soon as she had finished parochial school, a bright young girl named Lena shook the dust of ...
The things kids say !!
The things kids say !! 1) NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm ...
Church
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And ...
The Perfect Woman
An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so ...
Tragedy
Jesse Jackson is visiting a primary school and he visits one of the classes. They are in the ...
Priest
A very distinguished lady on a plane from Switzerland found herself seated next to a nice priest. ...
Circumcised
Two five year old boys are standing at the toilet to pee. One says, "Your thing doesn't have any ...
Fairy Tales
"Daddy," a little girl asked her father, "do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'? " " ...
Two choices in Life
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, Or get married and wish you ...
Kid's Stories
Kid's Stories While I sat in the reception area of my doctor's office, a woman rolled an elderly ...
Pregnant
A Ritchie County, West Virginia farmer got in his pickup and drove to a neighboring farm and ...
Students
These are actual comments made on students report cards by teachers in the New York City public ...
Grey Hair
Child: mum, why do you have grey hair? Mum: that happens when mums have naughty kids. Child: ah, ...
Nudist Camp
A young boy had been taken for his first visit to a nudist camp by his parents. He was surprised ...
What Is Butt Dust??
What Is Butt Dust?? What, you ask, is 'Butt dust'? Read on and you'll discover the joy in it! ...
Nuts
Two boy scouts went on a nature hike in the hills picking hickory nuts. Along the way, they filled ...
Gathering chickens
The farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chicken's his father had entrusted ...
Wong
Su Wong marries Lee Wong. The next year, the Wongs have a new baby. The nurse brings out a ...
Isn't that Precious?
Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX ...
Know better
A girl from Georgia and a girl from the west coast were seated side by side on an airplane. The ...
More Valentine
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride ...
Children
HOW THE BIRTH ORDER OF YOUR CHILDREN CHANGES THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE: Your Clothes: 1st baby: ...

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