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jokes about beer

reindeer beer cans santa
beer at the end of the rainbow
topless bartenders free beer false advertising
free beer great wifi
grolsh bottles crates smashed on the road beer
How germans see american beer
guy riding carbon box down the stairs drinking beer
what are you rooting for super bowl beer
free beer under a Canadian trap
I asked for a beer
I love you
Cold beer ad
beer, because you can not drink bacon
Do Re Mi
Do Re Mi Beer - by Homer J. Simpson

DOUGH... The stuff that buys me beer.
RAY... The guy ...

Why a beer is better than a woman
Why a beer is better than a woman You can enjoy a beer all month long Beer stains wash out ...
Beer
Scientist revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, they ...
Empty Beer Cans
Why did the blond have empty beer cans in ...
A neutron at a bar
A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. " ...
Beer Vs Vagina
BEER vs. VAGINA!!! There are no losers...really. 1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little ...
WHY MEN AREN'T SECRETARIES...
WHY MEN AREN'T SECRETARIES... Husband's note on refrigerator for wife: Someone from the ...
A Bar
A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and ...
A Beer before it starts
A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, " ...
The Three Little Pigs
Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night. The waiter came and took their drink order. "I ...
Beer
After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the Presidents of the brewreys decide to go ...
Hurry Up!
A guy comes home from work, runs into the living room, and flops down in front of the TV. He ...
Magic Beer
A lady walks into a bar and sees a really cute guy sitting at the counter. She goes over and asks ...
Counseling - Southern Style
Earl and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing Tobacco and drinking beer when ...
My wife left me...
My wife left me... I don't understand. After the last child was born, she told me we had to ...
Catholic Shampoo
Catholic Shampoo: While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer,wine, ...
Beer Troubleshooting
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet. FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle. ACTION: Rotate glass so ...
Beer Troubleshooting
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet. FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle. ACTION: Rotate glass so ...
Pretzels
A guy walks into a bar and takes a seat. Before he can order a beer, the bowl of pretzels in front ...
A newly wed Couple
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, ...
Investment
If you had bought $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00. With Enron, ...
Body Found
Body Found Today the Police found an unidentified man's body in a park nearby. They describe him as ...
Older Folks 7.
Three old guys are out walking. First one says, "Windy, isn't it?" Second one says, "No, it's ...
Old Guys
Three old guys are out walking. First one says, "Windy isn't it?". Second one says, "No its ...
The Duck
A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of lager and a ham sandwich. The landlord looks at him ...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING BELGIAN
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING BELGIAN: 1. You get to speak three languages, but none of them ...
Elderly People
Three elderly men go out walking:
First one says. "Windy isn't it? "
Second one says, "No ...
Booze Quotes
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they' ...
Two guys in a bar
Two men are in a bar. One man turns to the other and asks,"Tell me, why do you keep pouring beer ...
In bed with..
An elderly woman comes home and finds her daughter in bed with a vibrator. She screams at her, " ...
Hearing Story
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to ...
Little Johnny
A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and ...
All men hear
"All men hear is blah, blah, blah, blah, SEX, blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah, BEER." ...
A Frat
A frat boy gets into the back of a cab and asks the cabbie, "Do you have enough room up there for a ...
Horse
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit ...
Female Hormones
Two men drink in a bar. One man says, "Did you know that beer contains female hormones?" The ...
Robbed
A guy gets a call from the police telling him that his house was robbed. The offenders had also ...
Oil Change instructions
Oil Change instructions for women: 1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles ...
Retired
I've often been asked, 'what do you old guys do now that you're retired?' Well, I have a friend ...
A 2006 study
A 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found ...
The Aggie Bar
A Texas Tech graduate, a University of Texas grad and a Texas Aggie were sitting in a bar in San ...
Fishing
Fishing Trip Dave and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. ...
Flies
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter "What are ...
A Frizzle
Two men walk into a bar. One sits at one end of the bar and the other at the opposite end. The ...
Happy
A woman walks up to an old man sitting in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help but notice how ...
Flies
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are ...
Less
I went to the bar the other night and told the 'keep, "A glass of your finest Less, please." "' ...
Croc
A Drover walks into a bar with a pet crocodile by his side. He puts the crocodile up on the bar. ...
Flies
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter. "What ...
Gay Bar
A cowboy walks into a bar, a few miles West of Brokeback Mountain, and, after two steps in, he ...
Because I'm a Man - I
Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the ...
Men
What is the thinnest book in the world? What men know about women! Why don't men eat more M & M' ...
Homeless Man
Kirk was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking ...
Homeless Man
Kirk was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking ...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. Ok ok,give them a ...
Smart Dog
A man walks into a bar, after buying a beer he looks around the bar and sees three men and a dog ...
BBQ Rules
BBQ RULES We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory ...
New Bird
After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely ...
Two Brothers
There were two brothers. One was very good and tried to always live right and be helpful. His ...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH: 1. Two World Wars and One World Cup. 2. Warm beer. 3. You get ...
Mow the Lawn
One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the ...
Magician
Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at ...
Installing Husband 1.0
Installing Husband 1.0 Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband ...
An Englishman and a Scotsman
An Englishman and a Scotsman were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer. After a ...
Two Brothers
Once upon a time there were two brothers. One brother was very mischievous, always getting into ...
Male Fairytale
Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, "Will you marry me?" The Princess said, " ...
An Irish Point of View on the Election race..
An Irish Point of View on the Election race.. We, in Ireland , can't figure out why people are ...
Men Politically
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
  1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has ...
Checkup
A 75 year-old man goes to his doctor for a check-up.
Doctor: "You're doing fairly well for ...
Hot Day
It was a hot day... Helga hung out the wash to dry and then went downtown to pick up some dry ...
Another Affair
A man walks into a nightclub one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. Certainly, Sir, ...
Steve died
Steve, Bob, and Jeff were working on a very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls 50 feet to the ...
Political Correctness
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She ...
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has ...
Top Ten Country Western Songs
Top Ten Country Western Songs 10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine. 9. I Ain't Never ...
Texas Baby
A man from Texas buys a round of drinks for everyone in the bar as he announces his wife has just ...
Retirement...
As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to "make a difference" in the world. It is ...
Sue Companies
Bubba called his attorney and asked, "Is It true theys suin them cigarette companies fer causin ...
Snail
This snail crawls up to this bar as it was closing. The snail pounds and pounds on the door until ...
Perfect woman, perfect attitude.....
Perfect woman, perfect attitude..... 1. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste. 2. Are you ...
The Affair 3
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. 'Hurry,' she ...
Doctor
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I ...
Three Guys
Three guys are fishing when Fred gets up to get a beer, loses his balance and falls out of the boat. ...
Orange
A man with a giant orange for half of his head walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender ...
The top ten reasons why the television is better than the World Wide Web
10. It doesn't take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels. 9. When was the ...
A few Beers
"Well you see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest ...
Natural selection
Well you see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest ...
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH
TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH: 1. You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking ...
The Irishman
An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking beer. The bartender finally says that the bar is ...
T-shirt slogans
Some T-shirt slogans:
  • I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
  • I ...
More blondes 7
A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. "Six, ...
Bar Stool Economics
Our Tax System Explained: Bar Stool Economics Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer ...
My Generation vs. Your Generation
A very self-important university freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to ...
Full
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, ...
More blondes 11
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a Porsche? A: You dont lend the Porsche out to your ...
The best Toast of the Night
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs ...
Murphy's Lesser-Known Dictums:
Murphy's Lesser-Known Dictums: Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear ...
Ghost
A man comes into a bar, orders a beer and takes out of a bag a tiny piano and a 10 inch high man. ...
Cigarettes
A man tells his wife that he's going out to buy cigarettes. When he gets to the store he finds out ...
Cowboys
Two cowboys from Texas walk into a roadhouse to wash the trail dust from their throats. They stand ...
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