jokes about dogs

My wife says I cant have another dog
its better to have eaten something #dog
Has anybody seen my dog Lucky!
this dog must be blind
water for your dog
as I watched the dog chase his tail
here are some dog rules to live by!
Dogs look like kiss
Compare cats to dogs
If you can see my wiener youre too close #dog
Pretty special when your dog leaves you a special present
Lays Couch taste, Your dog will love it
I dont think you should kiss your dog like that
Do you know why your dog is happier than you
If your dog does a poo
This dog is too lazy to care
Why is it called a vet #doctor #dog
This is how dogs prefer Easter #rabbit
Only one animal in the zoo #shitzu #dog
Dog eats certificate of obedience training
this dog got caught in a booby trap
cat teases dog with mistletoe for Christmas
Set them free #dog
Pizza with extra sausage #dog
a perfectly timed picture of a fishing dog
that dog must yawn a lot!
a dog totally convinced about a drawing
Whats wrong with this mans face #dog
Pretty ironic what this dog just ate
these dogs dont like water!
this weird dog is banned from the park
this is how the ideal hotdog sandwich should look #dog
when a small dogs takes the large spot
 youre doing it wrong #dog #tree #fail
Perfect timed pic of a dog eating a cookie #timing
Find out who loves you more, your woman or your dog
this stuff doesnt work #dog
Tastes like #ass #donkey #dog
Dog failing like a boss jumping a fence
a dog wondering whos a good boy
dog and a baby discussing being gay
dog is glad youre home The Christmas tree fainted
dog loves grass that tickles his nipples
framed picture of a cat says my dog
Water for your dog
the moment my dog realizes
So you dog fetches balls
Guy walking his dog
sign for a lost dog
snoop dog posing
Dog lost the ball
dogs with their heads out the car window
Dog going down a slide
dog scared for seeing spider
dog peeing in mouth of guy in picture
dog caught fly but killed interior
dog mating with a pussy
photobomb level dog
mutual pillow dog sleeping on girl sleeping on dog
dog wants to be let in so he can beg to go out
man walking an awful lot of dogs
dog left dry spot on the patio after sleeping in the rain
dog laughing at cat
dog caught his tail
bed and breakfast dog in food bowl
dog pig bacon
dogs party
chicken hatching dog
dog looking surprised
dog in car shotgun passenger seat
dog in car wind
cat and dog floating in air
dog looks like its melting
kid drawing on dog
dog with cat on his head
the moment my dog decided he was done catching frisbee
snoop dog umbrella is for
boxer dog wearing gloves
dog looking weird because there is no coffee
dog with cookies on his head not eating self control
short run for dogs
comes with two subwoofters dog with two puppies
deep shit shut up fox between hunting dogs
Lazy dog
guy holding dog with his teeth
lost dog have you seen this
dog peeing on girl sunbathing
dog misses ball fail
dog fail food poster
found brownies smiling dog
yellow black chocolate meth lab funny looking dog
dog shitting crap posing blonde lady
dog ball car keeping
dog grill sausage licked
adult dog store inflatable leg
Woman Vs Dog
What's the difference between a dog barking on the front porch and a woman yelling on the back ...
Barking Dog
A blonde and her husband are lying in bed Listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has been in ...
Dogs
A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, " ...
Better
My coughing is much better now. I only set ...
My Dog Don't Bite
A hound dog lays in the yard and an old man in overalls sits on the porch. "Excuse me, sir, but ...
Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans
Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans 1 Blaming your farts on me..... not funny... not funny at ...
It Figures
A man and his son walk in the park and come upon two dogs humping. The son asks, "Dad what are ...
Dog
Joe was a steward for Fly High airlines. He watched as an older lady boarded the plane holding a ...
Dogs
Two women that are dog owners are arguing about which dog is smarter.... First Woman : "My dos is ...
Dogs
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their ...
Dogs
A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says " ...
Two Nuns
Two Irish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people ...
Dogs
Three people, 2 men and 1 woman, and their dogs are in the Vets waiting room. The first man's dog ...
Dog and wagon
A man is walking down the street and he sees a boy riding a wagon. The boy has his dog pulling it ...
Dogs Balls
2 guys were walking down the street and saw a dog lying on a porch licking his balls. Guy 1 ...
Dog Song
The official dogs’ song? “Every snack you take, every food you make, every can you shake, ...
Blind men
A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says " ...
Dog Ears
Q: What kind of dog eats with his ears? A: They all do. I haven’t seen a single dog remove ...
Hot Dog
What did the dog say to the hot ...
Talking Dog
This guy walks into a bar with his golden retriever. ''Hey, can I get a drink on the house if my ...
Cross-eyed Dog
A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him, "My dogs cross-eyed. Is there anything you ...
Baby Planes
A mother and her young inquisitive son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. ...
The German
A couple were walking their dog along the beach, the dog was having a great time running into the ...
Dead Dog
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. "You know," Mom ...
Guard Dog
A man was very proud of his guard dog, he would leave it to roam free in the garden to sow the ...
Jump
What dog can jump higher than a ...
Dog Chess
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the ...
Hot Dog
Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: ...
Dog
Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm a dog. Sit on the couch and we will talk about it. But I'm ...
Plants
"Some plants," said the teacher, "have the prefix 'dog'. For instance, there is the dogrose, the ...
Dog Tail
A guy was cutting the tail off his dog. His neighbor asked, "What the hell are you doing?" “My ...
Life
On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at ...
Catholic Dog
Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, ...
Composition
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy ...
Difference?
What is the difference between a dog on the back porch howling and a woman on the front porch ...
Smart Dog
A man walks into a bar, after buying a beer he looks around the bar and sees three men and a dog ...
Pessimist and a dog
An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that ...
Women and Cats
Women and cats will do as they please, men ...
Best Friend
A dog is truly a man's best friend. If you don't believe it, just try this experiment. Lock your ...
A Dog in Heat
A little girl asked her mum, "Mum, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mum replies, " ...
A blind man..
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash ...
At the Vet
A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to ...
Problems can be fixed...
A South Carolina farm wife called the local phone company to report her telephone failed to ring ...
A blind man
A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one day. They come to a busy ...
An Englishman and an Irishman
An Englishman and an Irishman were speaking sitting in a park bench when a horrible, ugly looking ...
Dog's Haircut
A friend took her dog to the parlor for a haircut, and asked what it would cost. Being told that it ...
Taxes
The income tax expert was visiting the school to talk about taxes. “I’m going to tell you now ...
The Butcher
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in its mouth reading: "10 lamb ...
Help Wanted
A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying: "HELP WANTED. ...
Actual Funny Pet Names
Does kitty dream of slinking down the catwalk? If so, give her a name that screams “I’m a star!â ...
Liver and Cheese
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female ...
Hair Remover
My neighbor found out that her dog could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet ...
The Dog
My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. ...
Indian
One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answers, "Well son ...
Snoring
A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can't sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see ...
Late again
"Late again!!" the third-grade teacher sternly said to little Sammy. "It ain't my fault this time, ...
Old Dog
An old, tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly ...
Holes
Mr. Brown was working in his garden when on the other side of the fence, he heard his neighbor ...
Talking Dog
A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." ...
Talking Dog
A guy is driving around and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings ...
Dog
Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for the puppies, Dallas and Smokey, at Wal- ...
Intelligent
A very intelligent boy was fortunate enough to be receiving a far better education than his parents ...
Stay
This guy pulls into a crowded parking lot and rolled down the car windows to make sure his dog had ...
Pet Rules
PET RULES To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height. Dear Dogs and Cats, ...
Funeral
A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession ...
Hotdog
One night these two men wanted to go out for drinks, but they didn't have any money. so the first ...
Old Joe
A farmer is in the middle of plowing his field when his tractor runs out of gas. He needs to get ...
Pet Owner
Pet Owner: "Every time a bell rings, my dog goes and sits in the corner."
Vet: "That's ...
K-9
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She ...
Zoo
A man went to a zoo but all it had ...
A newly wed Couple
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, ...
What does..
You must think with a clean mind: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down, a dog ...
Perspective
If you want to keep a true perspective of your own importance, get a dog that will worship you and ...
Country Song
What happens when you play a country song ...
The Two Duck Hunters
ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT. A guy ...
Top 10 Reasons to Know You're a Redneck
1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife. 2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, ...
Firefighter
A firefighter is working on the engine outside the station when he notices a little girl next door ...
Gifts
It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. ...
Skippy
A woman goes to her boyfriends' parents' house for Christmas dinner. This is to be her first time ...
Women
There was a guy walking down the street in San Fransisco, and he tripped over an old looking oil ...
Dog's and Cat's Diary
EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY: 8:00 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite! 9:30 a.m.Oh, boy! A ...
Crowded Train
London, The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an ...
The truths about life, that little children have learnt
1. No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats. 2. When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't ...
A Vet
"Darling," whispered a frail little husband from his chair. "I'm very sick, would you please call ...
A well-known Proverb
A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her ...
A young cowboy
A young cowboy from Wyoming goes off to college, but half way through the semester, he has ...
Halloween Riddles
Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school? He was buttering up his teacher. ...
Rude American
The train was packed, and the U. S. Marine Walked the entire length looking for a seat, but a well- ...
Two drunks
Two drunks had just gotten thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come ...
Wrong
The train was quite crowded, so a U. S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat, but the ...
Dogs
A Cocker Spaniel, a Poodle and a Great Dane found themselves in the waiting room at the veterinary ...
Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have Learned
Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have Learned * No matter how hard you try, you can' ...
Cross
What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic? Someone who lays awake ...
Cold Water
John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Georgia. After ...
A great email to forward to friends...
A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly ...
Airplane
After waiting for what seemed like an eternity, the stewardess announces over the intercom that "we' ...
A Dog's Rules for Christmas
A Dog's Rules for Christmas 1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They ...
Can Cold Water Clean Dishes?
Can Cold Water Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks that worry about using ...
Dog Talk
The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a doggie bar having a drink when a good- ...
Rehabilitation
A group of prisoners are in their rehabilitation meeting. Their task for today is to each stand up ...

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